An Ode to Retail Christmas 


'Twas the Day before Christmas and all thru the store
there were mothers and fathers and children galore.
The trolleys were pushed and the baskets were carried
in hopes that the line at the tills would not tarry.

At the Pharmacy counter, oh dear what a sight,
It was "Dances with Elbows" and verbal fist-fights.
The Children were screaming, in anger and strife
as I weighed up the options... 25 years to life.

There was moaning and groaning and complaints from the throng
and over it all played that Boney-M song.
The holiday shopping continued unabated
as a murderous spree was internally debated.

But at long last the shoppers were finally content
and my thoughts shed their plans of malicious intent
and now i'm at home, snug as bug in a rug,
MERRY CHRISTMAS to all, and to all ...BAH HUMBUG!